Life Update

I know another Life Update??? I mean this is just routine at this point. I want to let you know why I write so sparsely. Writing for me is an escape, whenever I feel anxious I go into writing or reading books.

So here’s the update! I’m into sewing now! I’m gathering supplies so I can start embroidering. I want to make clothes, I have a few patterns, but I need some good cloth to use. Also, I’ve been obsessed with my PlayStation 4; I got it a few months ago and I’ve been using it every day. It’s unbelievable that someone can get so gaga over Resident Evil 5.

So there it goes, my life update.


What am I Trying to Say?

That’s the question I ask myself a lot. Do you ever get that feeling? You have this thought that you want to share and for some reason you can’t express it. it becomes difficult to describe and then suddenly you’re rambling random shit that doesn’t make sense whit your original idea and now you’re stuck.

This happens a lot to me, but after rambling, I just freeze with a look of utter confusion. I end up looking like a person who just snapped out of a weird trance. like what my face looks like now.

2016 With Mysterium

So 2016 was a great year for me (except all the current events that made me feel all the feels) and a big chunk of that is because of Mysterium Philippines!

I was always fascinated by Tarot, mostly because I thought a deck of illustrated cards could tell me my future and shit; all thanks to all the horror movies I watched when I was younger. So when I was able to buy my own deck, I tried to learn tarot with the help of YouTube and a bunch of blogs.

I tried learning about tarot and I didn’t know my limitations. I needed someone to guide me and thankfully I found Mysterium.

I started May 2016 through their distance tarot program. I didn’t live far away, but I’m a lazy girl so I didn’t want to leave my fortress hahaha. It’s a six week course, one suit per week. I was given homework to do and I had to submit them at the end of every week. It was amazing, but I wanted to go the center to finally learn (and meet) from Sir Rob. OMG it wasn’t as different learning from the center and learning from your own home,  Sir Rob would answer all my questions (because I’m a worrier.) and would be so understanding of everyone.

Suffice to say after learning at the Mysterium center for one day… I liked it better because I like learning with classmates and getting to give each other tips and tricks also new friends!!! By the time we finished the Introduction to Tarot course, I signed up for multiple classes for the coming months.

A rundown of the courses I took:

  • Intro to Tarot- a six-week course. Learning with all the tarot basics plus you get to earn money while taking the course. It legit tells you that Tarot IS JUST A GUIDE. You make your own future. Mysterium tells its Tarot students to empower their clients and to never doom them to a future they don’t want.
  • Intuitive awakenings -want to enhance or “open your third eye.” You get a rundown on chakras, auras, and how to connect to your intuitive side. You’ll learn how to see, hear, feel, or see things you don’t normally see, oh and how you can ignore them when you want to.
  • Tarot for Self Discovery- a whole day workshop. It helps you use tarot to talk to your unconscious. *bring tissues, you might cry.
  • Advanced Tarot -a lot like Tarot for Self Discovery but it introduces new ways to use tarot besides just reading it. *pre- req intro to tarot. 7 week course.
  • Advanced Intuitive Awakening- you watched Doctor Strange? it’s kinda like that. you learn about astral projection. *drink lots of water and get lots of rest it’s a bit tiring.
  • Seraphim Blueprint level 1- the first in the Philippines (THANK YOU, SARAH!) a healing modality that works with angels. It’s a whole day thing with lots of meditation/attunements. *no coffee before class and drink lot of water in between.
  • Reiki 1- an intro and an attunement of one of the most popular energy healing modalities. It teaches how to channel energy for self-healing and healing for others. * drink lots of water between the breaks.

Sir Rob is hilarious and frank. He would tease us if we asked weird questions, but he would answer them and then he would tell us his experiences. He’s been reading the tarot for more than 20 years, so he has a lot to share with us. He became a friend to all of us as well. He would encourage us to start our own tarot business and damn right he would help you too if you have problems.

Ma’am Sarah is different from Sir Rob, she’s absolutely caring and sweet. My first class with her was Seraphim Blueprint level 1. To see someone as passionate in helping and healing other people,  she gave me the reason to look into energy healing. She showed me how compassion and empathy connects us all. She’s like the mom of Mysterium.

*btw Sir Rob and Ma’am Sarah are married to each other. Such a beautiful couple. Love emojis!!!

Mysterium Philippines is a great esoteric learning center, you get teachers who are legit supportive and you get to meet people with the same interests while learning. I felt so accepted and I made new friends. They made my 2016 the best.

contact Mysterium here:



Mysterium Philippines Learning Center
Mezzanine Unit, Burgundy Place Condominium
Katipunan Ave., Cor. B. Gonzales St., Quezon City


Shitty poetry pt. Rose

I felt tense, I couldn’t breathe. Everything felt like melting away and I can’t grab anything. My mind is slipping and I’m crying. Never in my life have I felt this.

I’m in a beige padded room and the rose whispered “nevermore” it kept whispering till I slept. When I woke up the rose is there.

The rose is real, it’s real. Everything was real. My mom told me that I’m not mad and that everything would be okay. The rose disappeared.

Everything is real. Nothing is unreal. Nothing but roses.

Felt a bit sad, so I checked my old emails

If you went through this blog, you know that I have depression and that is hard for me. I’ve been feeling all kinds of lonely this week, so I decided to check old messages, emails, and posts. First was my twitter, I read other people’s old tweets mostly, I like how people tweet about their day and stuff. I checked Facebook off my list because I am not going through that timeline thing. I read old texts from my sisters and from my dad; I miss them. The last one I checked were my emails, I found old receipts from iTunes and Book Depository and deals for travels (I wish I got them).

I found this particular email I got from a person that I really inspire me. I read what I sent her and what she replied to me. It brought back all the happiness I felt when I got her reply and reading what she had written. THAT email reminded me why I accept my emotions, even if it’s sadness. I am reminded that one of the reasons that we are human is that we feel.

I need to print that email and stick it to my wall, just so I can remind myself why I’m alive.

Productivity Break

I’ve been MIA for the past couple of months, things happened ( I won’t get into details), and now I find myself out of school (I dropped out for this semester) with nothing to do. At first I was like “YES! A BREAK FOR MY SOUL TO HEAL!” but I found myself being unproductive and just sitting on my sorrow.

I decided to make my “break” a productive one, I made cross-stitched bookmarks, I made bracelets out of those rubber bands, and I started reading a lot. I’ve been in love with reading since I was like 12 years old, my grandpa would take me to a bookstore (where I did spend a lot of hours in) every sunday. He would buy me books every week and I would finish them all. When I started college… well, I didn’t get time to read books (that were not school related) a lot.

Here comes my escape NetGalley! It’s a place where you can download books for free and review them in your blog… I can do both, so why not? I’ve been trying to write reviews and I want to read so this is a great opportunity!

You interested? If you are, first things first, you need to register to their website so you can request for titles (books) from publishers to download, and review them. Update your profile so more publishers can approve your requests for titles. It’s a great website!

In the next months you’ll see a bunch of reviews and of course random thoughts.

Summer’s Over.

So here’s the deal, I don’t like it when Summer ends. Why? well for one reason, I have to go back to standardized tests, Beige colored classrooms, and a mix of crazy professors. I made it clear I do not like being in school, but enough of that. What did I do this summer?

I was a Summer Bummer. I had no summer classes, and no trips planned. Yeah I went out with friends but not enough to make this summer memorable. I immersed myself in crafting. I finished my first ever cross stitch, and I became obsessed with Rainbow Loom. I read books. I finished The Bell Jar by Sylvia Plath, and Fangirl by Rainbow Rowell. I did finish Paper Towns by John Green, but I didn’t like it. It felt weird, I don’t know if it was with the metaphors, the unrealistic characters, or I don’t know, there was something about that book I didn’t like.

Most of my friends in University graduated this summer. I will walk to my university gates all alone. That scares me.

Summer is over, time to switch my flip-flops for my rain boots, my loom for my laptop, and my laziness for my productivity.