I’m a prude. There I said it. Nobody thinks about me or people like me except when they want to play.
I’ve never been to parties. I’m always in the lib, trying to keep my head down. Hiding behind friends. Friend.
I hide the jealousy with responsibility, but it comes off as me being a prude. Why can’t be like them?
Blindly having fun with guns and knives. They enjoy beer with bloody hands. Lights would the only thing I would enjoy with them.
I will never pull them to where I am, but it isn’t fair for them to trap me here. Alone in the dark with the monsters. I need light.
You are all I remember.
The sound of your voice.
How your hair sticks out.
That smile you rarely give out.
I miss you, my love.
Where did you go?
You left me in the middle of the desert where we found our oasis.
Our paradise does not exist anymore because you left.
I’m still searching for you, my love.
Please let me see you through my blindfold.
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Do you think the unthinkable lingers behind your mind? Are we all thinking about it? All I know is that it plants its roots deep enough for it to stay forever. I hope yours is out, and you’re growing flowers instead. Never let the weeds grow, plant trees.
An apple a day keeps the doctor away
that’s what they say, it’s bullshit.
Next they’ll tell me the bottle will make me better
it doesn’t, it locks me in a cage. They call me
Xanthippe. a word that describes how I am
to them, most of the time.
I don’t disagree, I have something inside me.
More than Angst, More than Anger. I don’t understand.
Everyone says it’s all in my mind
Fuck that, it isn’t.
To call them blind is part of my message
and another is
“You’ll not find Peace but Entropy in me.
I hug her tight
She doesn’t put up a fight
She’s happy I’m here
She’s not alone
We are together. We are one.
I’m scared. I’m running. The wind passes through my hair. I can’t see anything but all I think of is her.
She’s my haven. The place where I feel safe. Let me be with her. Let me runaway. Please.
My life would be complete with her. Her arms wrapped around me. Her love surrounding me.
I felt tense, I couldn’t breathe. Everything felt like melting away and I can’t grab anything. My mind is slipping and I’m crying. Never in my life have I felt this.
I’m in a beige padded room and the rose whispered “nevermore” it kept whispering till I slept. When I woke up the rose is there.
The rose is real, it’s real. Everything was real. My mom told me that I’m not mad and that everything would be okay. The rose disappeared.
Everything is real. Nothing is unreal. Nothing but roses.
I saw a girl yesterday, She was screaming at something. She had this rage, you could feel it too. I felt it, like you know those weird aura shit. She was screaming, but nobody confronted her about her tirade. I mean children were near her! I had to stop it, I want up to her and said “excuse me? Please stop it, you have every reason to be mad, I’m sure. Just stop, the children can hear you.” she stopped and whispered “no I won’t!” and she started screaming at me. I left, I was scared of her, she obviously lost it.
When I was home, I wondered why the other people didn’t tell her stop. The parents of the kids were just not minding her. It’s weird. I was disturbed by her, how can someone with so much rage, so much anger lives in this world, what happened to her? I don’t want to be her.
You’ve been living life,
Hustling the busy streets.
You’re probably tired,
Do you cry at night?
Are you scared of the darkness?
Is that why you’ve been fighting to be where
The light shines?
You haven’t stopped,
I guess the difference between me and you,
Is that you hide in the light
While I try to live in the darkness.